You Said You Were Nice*

I have been working at Starbucks for awhile now, and some parts of the job are really good. I get five free drinks a day if I want and a free pound of coffee a week. Plus I get a lot of free yogurt (recently expired) that usually costs 3 bucks a piece, and my family was actually fighting over it. Other than the freebies I have met some really awesome girls and a couple guys, and they make the job that much better. I’ve been trying to embrace the fact that I have money coming in and I get to be around people throughout the day. When I was just job hunting I saw my sister, brother-in law, niece, and mother on weekdays and that was about all.

Despite the good parts to the job, I have been having trouble with one of my co-workers. Something about him has really been rubbing me the wrong way. It could be that he always seems to be flirting with the girls he works with, even though he has a girlfriend. It could also be that he’s made it his project to get me to like him. His grand plan to put himself in my good books is to tell really bad jokes to get me to laugh. I do laugh occasionally, but only because I am so uncomfortable. One day he decided to flat out ask me why I didn’t like him, so I said “because you’re creepy. Well maybe just your face is creepy.” To this he responded “you said you were nice when you got hired.” Maybe not the best thing to say, in fact the whole thing seems really high school.

Although I am not proud of my behavior, it makes sense now that I have figured out the reason  that I find him creepy.  That is, he looks and acts so much like my high school boyfriend.

When I was 17 I went to New Brunswick for the summer to help at my uncle’s summer camp. My cousins and there friends also worked there at the time. I was young and impressionable and ended up developing a crush on my cousin’s best friend. Turns out he liked me too. When I got back to Saskatchewan we chatted everyday on MSN Messenger, which now seems so archaic. After a couple weeks of chatting it was pretty clear to both of us that we liked each other, so we decided to try the long distance thing. To maintain a long distance relationship we would talk on the phone every night and IM. Some days we would talk for 4, 5, even 6 hours. Now that seems so nauseating.

After about 3 months of “dating” he started to do a lot of things that bothered me and I thought were unusual. He would get angry if I wanted to go out with my friends instead of staying home and talking to him. He started requiring me to send him pictures of myself so he could make sure I looked okay. And if I didn’t look up to his standards he would ridicule me. I had a lot of guy friends at the time, and we would hang out a few times a week to study. My boyfriend would get mad that they were there and didn’t really want me to hang out with them. Something was really off and I knew that I didn’t want to be treated the way he was treating me anymore. It may not seem serious to some people, but make no mistake it was verbal and emotional abuse. I had tried to break up with him, but he  already planned a visit to come see me. So I let him come. Once he was there in person he didn’t seem as jealous or controlling, so I tried to give him a chance. However, once he was gone again I remembered why I wanted to break up.

At the time I had applied and been accepted to two University’s, and one was in New Brunswick. I prayed hard about where the right school was and if it wasn’t UNB then I knew I needed to break up with him. I woke up one morning with such clarity that it needed to be over and I was to go to University in Alberta. I called and broke up with him. First he cried a lot and then he got angry. His anger turned into him contacting a lot of my family and telling them what a b*tch I was. The sad thing is that some of them believed him. Once I told people how horrible he had been treating me they understood why I “broke his heart”.

I know that was a long story, but it was an even longer few months. So to my co-worker at Starbucks, that is the reason that I find your face creepy. Also, to any girls who are allowing or have allowed a man to treat them as anything less than they deserve, just DUMP HIM, it will make life a lot nicer.

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